Is This The Real Life? Is This Just Fantasy?

Today I woke up feeling all the feelings… Is today the Day? Will I finally be blessed? I have been waiting for so long… I’m beginning to lose myself in this tunnel, please, let there finally be light! 

Got up, feeling all anxious, ate a biscuit, drank some excuse of a coffee and went to seek the Answer. 

“What if nothing had happened, what if they made a mistake? I don’t have the strength to conquer them anymore, no one seems to know the answers…”. “Just wait”, they told me, ”you will soon receive, what you so desire, just be patient…”. 
“Well, I do not have another choice now, do I?” …
 I was getting closer and closer to the destination… to the Answer. Here I was, finally, face to screen, my knees trembling both because of hunger and nerves, I insert the card that holds all the answers and wait… 
“Hello, Ms. Panteva” flashes on the screen, “what would you like to do on this fine day?”, “I wish to make an inquiry”, I say. I enter the key that unlocks all the answers and again, I wait… 
1…2…3…4… “Congratulations, you now have money worth of two scholarships and you may finally proceed to live like a normal human being!”. 
“Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality.” …
Yeah, it’s still hard for me to believe, but it is real. I can finally eat more than just once a day, I can finally buy some things, which I usually use every day, I can finally eat lunch with my classmates… 
You may find this post very weird and pointless, but I cannot explain what I had to go through this past month. I have to say that I am a bit disappointed. It is not like they didn’t have the money, they just didn’t transfer them to the students. Sad story, really. There was even a point when I wished I had never thought of coming here, because there wasn’t even a single thing that was going right and okay. “Oh, your scholarship? Yeah, about that… it doesn’t matter if you arrived on the 8th, you’re not going to get it on the 10th like all the other students in this university, Chinese government scholarships are er… special. Check at the end at the month. Oh, and yeah, you are going to need around RMB 1500 for documents and courses, so good luck with finding money!”. 
“Um, it’s already the end of the month, I still don’t have anything…?” –  “Er… check after holiday, maybe then!”.
Well, okay then, if I am still moving after these 10 days with less then RMB 100.
Whatever. From now on, no more bad feelings. This month has been very tough and I am glad that it is over. It’s finally time for me to feel good. =)

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